If your marriage is under strain, the first thing I want you to know is that the Lord loves you and cares deeply about this very practical area of your life. Do you remember Jesus’ very first miracle? Our Lord turned water into wine at a wedding feast, a celebration of marriage. He brought a miracle of supply to a couple starting married life together—even before He healed the sick, fed the hungry, or raised the dead.
That’s not all. There’s a beautiful scripture of prophecy about our Lord Jesus which says, “Lover and friend hast thou put far from me” (Ps. 88:18 KJV). That came to pass at Calvary as our Lord Jesus hung alone on the cross. As He bore the judgment for your sins and mine, He also bore all the loneliness and pain of broken relationships so that you can walk in His beautiful vision for your marriage.
Do you know what that is? It’s of you enjoying your marriage, spending your days rejoicing with your husband or wife, and being enraptured or intoxicated with each other (Prov. 5:18–19). But the Lord knows that after a season of mouths to feed, bosses to please, diapers to change, dinners to prepare, and tight schedules to juggle (all made more exhausting during a long, drawn-out pandemic), the wine can run out of your marriage. And He wants to supply His inexhaustible grace to the both of you so you can have an intoxicating marriage.
The first thing He is inviting you to do is to talk to Him about what’s bothering you in your marriage. As you talk to the Lord about your situation, ask Him, “Lord, how do You see my marriage?” and allow Him to give you His fresh, life-giving vision for your marriage. It doesn’t matter how long you’ve been married or how long you’ve had that problem in your marriage. In John’s account of the wedding in Cana, the master of ceremonies marveled that the bridegroom had kept the “best wine” for the end (John 2: 1–11 NLT).
This means that if your marriage had love once upon a time and you both seem to have lost that love now, our Lord Jesus can infuse it with even more passion, emotional intimacy, and sweetness when you allow Him to restore the wine back into your marriage. At the wedding in Canna, not only did the Lord give the couple the best wine, He gave them more than they needed (6 Jewish water pots filled to the brim is about 135 gallons or 600 liters,1 definitely more than enough for a wedding reception in a small town).
Beloved, see Him doing that for your marriage too! See an oversupplying flow of fresh oil, of the Lord’s shalom, coming into your marriage to remove every bit of friction that has plagued your relationship with your spouse. It’s not about you trying to love and forgive each other by self-effort. I believe that even as you see Him in the midst of your marriage, being the super-glue holding you both together, He will start to replace the negative pictures of your marriage you’ve been carrying on the inside with glorious pictures of days of heaven on earth. And He will enable and empower you to flow in forgiveness, love, wisdom, and the right feelings and actions at the right time.
Beloved, as you and your spouse each keep your focus on Jesus, His love, and His finished work, Jesus Himself will draw the both of you closer together, and cause your marriage to be stronger than ever before. Do go to the praise report section to read the story of a couple whose failing marriage was restored after they realized the Lord wanted them to have a union that was sweeter than wine!